I’ve thought about something a lot recently and it’s the fact that in today’s day and age, almost all of us use social media in one way or another. Some of us use it in multiple ways. For instance, I have this blog, a Twitter, a Facebook, and an Instagram. I guess I’ve wondered a lot lately, what do these social mediums imply about our lives? I know some people who’s whole lives are played out on Facebook. I know where to find them at any given moment of the day and what they’re doing and who they’re with.
One major thing I see on social media, Facebook especially, are the relationships people are in. Now I’m sure for the most part, when your friends with someone you already know who they’re dating so you don’t really pay attention to their relationship status, but if you meet someone new, especially someone who is cute, that might be the first thing you look at. Am I right? You creep on their social media accounts to find out if they’re dating anyone or if they have pictures up with people of the opposite sex. I know many of us don’t openly admit it, but it’s something we do. It makes the social interaction between us easier because it avoids that awkward conversation of “are you with someone?” We can find out anonymously and proceed with what we’re going to do.
Most people who know me, know I am not one to shy away from posting things on my social media concerning who I’m dating, what I might be doing at that moment, or even the occasional ‘look at what I’m eating’. But recently I have kept my relationship out of a lot of my social media. If you were to take a look at my Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter you would think I’m a single crazy cat lady. There’s no mention of me even having a significant other. I’m certainly not averse to posting statuses or photos of the people I’m dating, but I think it’s something that should be done by both parties, as you don’t want to look like your with someone and yet their profiles look like they aren’t with anyone.
Much of those reason I haven’t posted anything about my relationship on these sites is because my significant other doesn’t. If you were to look at his profiles, it either looks like he’s single or he’s dating his ex-girlfriend. To strange for me to date someone who doesn’t put anything about themselves out there. I find things like Facebook to be a great way to keep up with people and to find out what they’re doing in their lives. Now granted, it could be completely made up, and I think we all understand that to some extent. If you haven’t seen someone in 5 years, do you really know if what they’re posting is real or just what they want others to see?
Sometimes it leaves me to wonder though. If I’m portraying myself as unattached in a public forum, does that essentially make it so? I know many people would say no, but think of it this way…if a guy goes out to a bar and removes his wedding ring before he goes inside, is he not portraying himself as available to the others in the bar? And wouldn’t you be upset if that was your husband who did that or if you were the girl who tried to pick him up at the bar if you found out? Sometimes that’s what it feels like, like I’m that skeezy guy who removed his wedding ring before going out. Granted, a wedding ring or posts on social media won’t stop some people, but for most of us out there with some foundation of moral ethics, it would stop us. We wouldn’t go after the person with the ‘in a relationship’ status.
I just wonder, is it keeping one foot outside the relationship? I know it’s different for everyone but sometimes I get the feeling like that’s what it is…I’m keeping my options open because unless they were to run across this post and they ran across it today, they’d think I was a single lady who has 2 cats that she adores and it would look like my boyfriend is not dating me, but his ex.
Does anyone have any thoughts on this? I’d love some feedback from everyone as I know people from different generations probably have different viewpoints. Am I crazy or is this making some sense? Bueller?